Impermanence

One idea that is becoming clearer in my mind as I get older is the idea of impermanence.  The nature of life is that things are always changing.  It was the Greek philosopher Heraclitus who said, “We step and do not step in the same river twice.”  I remember reading this quote in high school and being in awe of its cleverness.  “Of course,” I thought - because the water in a river is always moving, when you step into a river the second time it is not the same water that you touched when you stepped in the first time.  So true.  Like the water in a river, life is always moving and changing. 

 

It wasn’t until recently, though, that my understanding of the idea of impermanence began to have a positive impact on my experience.  Eric Butterworth in his book In the Flow of Life says, “life comes to pass.”  At first glance, one might interpret that to mean that life happens or life transpires.  But upon closer inspection, it becomes clear that what Butterworth is driving at is that life comes for the purpose of passing.  In other words, in life, situations and circumstances come and go, and things don’t stay the same, and this is exactly how life is meant to be.   The sooner we get on board with this idea, the easier it becomes to get into the flow of life.

In her book When Things Fall Apart author Pema Chodron makes the case that the majority of suffering for human beings is caused by their tendency to be constantly striving to get “solid ground” under their feet, when in truth in life there is no such thing.  The ground is always shifting and changing.  In Buddhism, impermanence (or anicca) is recognized as one of the three characteristics of existence. The Buddha taught that because no physical or mental object is permanent, desires for or attachments to either causes suffering

I find lately that as I go through my days, this idea of impermanence is really beginning to sink in.  While I don’t enjoy the idea that my loved ones will not always be with me or that the happy circumstances of my life are only temporary, I do notice that accepting this truth brings a suprising sense of peace and calm.  I also notice that I get lots of comfort from understanding that many of the negative circumstances of my life will eventually pass and that I don’t have to get too wrapped up in them or give them too much attention.

When I look around my house and I see shoes and clothes and books and my children’s other belongings strewn from one end of my living space to the other, it’s easier for me to relax in the face of the mess and remember that there will soon come a day when my children are no longer living in my house and that this particular mess is only temporary and I can focus more of my attention of enjoying my children while they are still living in my home.  

When I am feeling stressed about finances and I find myself wanting to focus too heavily on the struggle to make ends meet, I can remind myself that this too shall pass and then it becomes easier to relax and enjoy the things that I have rather than agonize over the things that I don’t.

As a person who craves routine and has always tried desperately to bring order and regimen to her life, I would think that this idea of impermanence would bring tremendous discomfort, but instead I am finding as I get older that embracing the idea of impermanence brings joy and a sense of freedom that I have never known in all of my years of trying to keep things under my control.

~REBECCA