Prayers

Three years ago a friend of mine suffered an unthinkable tragedy – the loss of a child.  She shared her entire heart-wrenching journey on Facebook - from the day her 7-year-old son had his first seizure, to his brain cancer diagnosis, through his many medical procedures, and finally to his death in her arms in Germany  where they had gone to receive a new miracle treatment.  In my eyes, this friend is a hero.  The courage and willingness to be vulnerable that it took for her to share the intimate details of this awful ordeal with an entire community of friends, family members, and strangers is extraordinary.  We all experienced her son’s illness along with her, and now we are experiencing her terrible pain and debilitating grief, as well.  The depth of emotion that surrounds this story is almost too much to bear, even for me as a bystander.  I can’t even imagine how raw she must be feeling.  My heart aches for her and for her family.   

  

Jacob

This same friend recently commented on Facebook that she is happy for a couple whose prayers have been answered – their child has received a clean bill of health – but she wonders why God didn’t answer her prayers.  Why didn’t God make her child well?  

How do you respond to a question like that when somebody is going through Hell?  It's not hard to see why a person would question God in the wake of such a devastating loss.  I've tried to picture what I would do in her shoes.  Would I get any comfort from the Unity principles?  Would I have the presence of mind to practice the type of prayer that Unity teaches? 

On the topic of prayer, in his book The Gathering, Unity minister Jim Rosemergy states , “A need is not an avenue through which God can work . . . Whatever God is doing, God is always doing it . . . If God could end the wars that plague the earth, it would be done.  If the Almighty could end the pandemics, they would be no more.  . . . If God’s work was handling needs, when a need appeared, it would be met. . . We continue to insist that a need is an avenue for God’s power, and it is not. . . Needs do serve a purpose; they turn us to God.  We identify the need and then no longer focus on it.  We turn to God and release the need . . . and instead we seek a greater awareness of the presence of God.” 

Emmet Fox recommends something similar in his Golden Key exercise:  “All that you have to do is this: Stop thinking about the difficulty, whatever it is, and think about God instead. This is the complete rule, and if only you will do this, the trouble, whatever it is, will presently disappear. It makes no difference what kind of trouble it is. It may be a big thing or a little thing; it may concern health, finance, a lawsuit, a quarrel, an accident, or anything else conceivable; but whatever it is, just stop thinking about it, and think of God instead -- that is all you have to do.”

This way of praying is challenging for me to practice when I have a burning desire for a new sweater or a summer vacation.  It’s hard to imagine that I could muster such faith and trust and non-attachment to outcomes if the stakes were as high as my child’s living or dying. 

Ultimately I know that there is very little I can say to ease my friend’s pain.  I can only be present for her and offer her my quiet support as she moves through the stages of grief in her own way and in her own time.  I would like to believe that the Unity principles would bring me peace if I were in her shoes.  I wish for peace for my friend and her family - knowing that the light of God surrounds them and the love of God enfolds them through this difficult time.  Please join me in holding Jacob's family in prayer.

~REBECCA